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Maryland Sucks

Granted, when you're living this close to another state, peeps from the other side are gonna hate you back. 

Maryland, besides being about a gazillion dollars in debt, ill prepared to let folks know not to drink their water, lacking in decent piping, and full of horrible drivers, has a problem with bicycles… or rather, to be specific, bicycle paths.

I work at the end of a particularly scenic and windy ass road.  Every morning, folks are happily biking to and fro… without a care in the world.  Because this road is small and fucked up, the fine folks over at the MDOT decided to put in a bike path, so that people with vehicles that can kill wont end up pissed the fuck off behind some pretentious douche in a pointy hat and pants that make their balls very prominent.  Such is the recipie for disaster… especially if said dumbass decides to go a-joyridin' at 3pm… when work has let out.

The only problem with this picturesque scenario?  The fucking bike riders dont fucking use the fucking bike path.  Doesnt matter which direction they are headed, or what time it is.  Doesnt matter if they have a Presidential motercade behind them… they wont use the damn path.  Today, as I was walking back from the Safeway, I was actually passed by a bike… the bike passed me in the grass, next to the sidewalk I was happily walking on.  The bike path?  A few more feet to the right. 

Its incredible that so many fucking morons cant seem to read the fucking sign that fucking says to fucking use the fucking bike path!  Can you imagine how many tax dollars could have been saved if some of these "Tour de France" asshat wannabees had actually showed up at the meeting to improve the road?! 

Ok… I'm done now.

</rant>

Update at 4:08pm and 8:48pm: Would you fucking believed that one of these jackasses was actually doing exactly what I described on my way home?  Would you believe that I actually slowed down while passing and yelled at him to get in the bike lane?  And would you believe that he caught up to me at a stop sign and smashed his fist on my brand new car!?  Yeah… cops wouldnt do anything.  Say that since he didnt hurt the car, it wouldnt matter.  How about attempted assault?  This happened at the intersection of the Clara Barton Parkway and the MacArthur Blvd.  I hate these fucks.  With an unholy passion.  I was actually tempted to drive after the guy, police report be damned, and run him over with my car.  Its a horrifying feeling, and yet ridiculously tempting. 

I hate Maryland. 

Discussion

One response to “Maryland Sucks

  1. hahahahahaHAHAHAhahahhaaaaa…ahahaa..ahem….this made me chuckle…especially your photo with the wonderfully incorrect spelling…hilarium, i tell you!  🙂

    Like

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